Is He Nuts?

The Cone of Silence

Like many loyal, red-blooded Americans, including this Registered Republican, “this Putin thing” is making me nervous about our commander-in-chief.

Did the President of Some of the People All the Time really throw our usually respected intelligence agencies under the bus, telling the world he believed the Russian denials of meddling? Why? Because Putin sounded so sincere.

Or didn’t he?

Was it all a problem of double negatives, the old Would vs. Wouldn’t grammatical problem that could happen to any president meeting with the leader of a hostile nation that had been trying to destroy your country for the last fifty years, compounded by the fake news, which still doesn’t believe it’s all a hoax.

The dean of the Josef Goebbels school of journalism, press secretary and minister of propaganda Sanders, who has mastered the art of explaining a lie by making the lie even more true by repetition, has clarified what was said on the world stage which seemed to be insulting America.

The first clarification was then clarified by the second and third. It’s easy to understand all the clarifications and walk-backs because the president’s words made him sound like a traitor.

The pen might be mightier than the sword, it has been said. Mightier still is the eraser.

As if all that wasn’t bad enough at Helsinki, there was the puzzling news of the president inviting his apparent friend, the ex-KGB killer, to the White House. That was something not even Stalin or Lenin could pull off.

Didn’t you just love the way the President of Some of the People All the Time required the meeting be behind closed doors, no note-takers or the usual advisers? It was an idea that may have been inspired by seeing the Cone of Silence in “Get Smart” when Agent 86 (Don Adams) took meetings that way with the Chief.

What was settled in the 2 hour and 10 minute Cone of Silence? Whether Vladimir the Terrible wanted the Lincoln Bedroom or the Red Room in the White House? Who knows?

Even the locked- out director of National Intelligence expressed astonishment at this second summit idea. The look on Dan Coats’ face when Andrea Mitchell told him the surprising news was priceless. Was his shoe phone out of order?

Holy Joe McCarthy! Doesn’t our POTUS know who this guy Putin is?

He should have looked him up in Google, even if he didn’t need to read any of the intelligence briefings, as is his way, before putting his head of hair into the mouth of this big bad Russian bear.

Suffice it to say, his houseguest is a man who rose to the top at the Kremlin on a carpet of dead bodies and lies that would embarrass even our prevaricator-in-chief.

When you invite termites into the house, the old Russian folk saying goes, before you know it you have no kitchen left.

Three hypotheses present themselves about why our guy is acting so crazy in dealing with Vladimir the Great.

  1. He’s a communist. Well, they don’t call him Agent Orange for nothing. His attacking our allies in NATO, sowing discord in the western alliance, while sucking up to Putin would have been red meat for the Republican party before it became a fellow traveller, accepting Comrade Trump’s love affair with the Reds.
  2. He doesn’t want to ruin all the business deals he and his associates set up during the campaign. Some of us may have forgotten his people were about to sign the papers for the biggest hotel in Moscow when the Rooskies invaded the Crimea. Corrupt oligarchs were lined up ready to invest in building a chain of Trump hotels, like playing a game of Monopoly. Not to mention selling Ivanka products to mujiks in the steppes and Kushner’s condos in Siberia.
    Greed explains it all.
  3. He’s too stupid to know what game Putin is playing, making the nyet collusion comrade in Washington seem as red as a rose.

The correct answer may be all of the above, or none of the above.

Our commander-in-chief, winner of the Alfred E. Neuman Peace Prize for his Singapore summit with the fat boy, has tweeted “the Helsinki meeting was GREAT.” But we few remaining anti-communists in the grand old Republican Party will have to wait to learn what other surprises will be coming out of the Helsinki massacre. By definition, that’s what a surprise means.

During the campaign, Comrade Trump bragged about how he could shoot somebody on Fifth Avenue, and his people would still vote for him.

Helsinki was the shot heard around the world.



Marvin Kitman,
July 24, 2018

Marvin Kitman is the author of “The Making of the Preƒident 1789.” “George Washington’s Expense Account” by Gen. George Washington and Marvin Kitman PFC (Ret.) was the best-selling expense account in publishing history.